Sports, Satire and Bad Jokes
Thursday February 9th 2012

F(*)(*)k 'em Up Friday: Thank You Sir May I Have Another Edition

Fuck ‘em up Friday is a weekly post that occurs, you guessed it, every Friday. Bringing you some of the best knockouts, submissions, and knockers that the inter-webs have to offer. It’s basically my way of glorifying violence, as well as giving in to the urges of my pre-pubescent inner child. Yeah, that’s how I roll.

No time to fuck around. Let’s get right to the knockout.

Give credit where credit is due. It takes a certain skill-set to take a punch to the face. Usually including, but not limited to: a high pain tolerance and a strong chin. Oh yeah, and being batshit crazy doesn’t hurt either. However, I’m not sure what it takes to let your opponent repeatedly punch you in the face like the fighter in the video above, but I’m sure it has something to do with a rapidly depleting supply of brain cells.

Sure the “Yeah, go ahead and hit me” psych out may appear like you’re a tough badass who spends their free time killing and skinning your meals, but that only really works with one, maybe two punches. By openly inviting a barrage of headshots, you’re asking to feel the sour stench of defeat…and the stench that comes with crapping your pants when you lose consciousness.

I especially like the part where the guy hops up, and then gives one of those “Why’d you stop it?” looks to the ref. Which, if I were the ref I would say something like, “Dude you have piss running down the side of your leg and drool caked on the corners of your mouth. Shut up, sit down and enjoy the knockers!”

ksstripperpoleThat being said, it also takes a certain skill set to strip. Usually including, but not limited to: daddy issues, dependency issues, and all sorts of self-esteem issues — things that most men try to avoid in a woman, besides VD, but never seem to remember when their face is wedged in between a set of silicone-infused breasts.  Next thing you know, you’re openly inviting the stripper to hit you in the face with said silicone-infused breasts. But it always costs extra. By that point you’re on the verge of being blackout drunk and overdrawn on your bank account. Either overdrawn, or your wife has canceled your card. Neither scenario is good and was the worst way possible for me to spend last Friday night is no way to spend a Friday night.

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Related posts:

  1. F(*)(*)k 'em Up Friday: The Best Things Come in Pairs Edition
  2. F(*)(*)k ‘em Up Friday: Short & Sexy Edition
  3. F(*)(*)k 'em Up Friday: 10 Seconds in Heaven Edition
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