Sports, Satire and Bad Jokes
Saturday November 26th 2011

What The Germans Are Thankful For

What I’m thankful for, is drunk me randomly finding this video on some German site. That and then finding an embeddable version on YouTube which has less than 20 views, which means it’s pretty fucking new.

The Germans apparently have a lot less to be thankful for. For starters, that scenery looks like something out of an alternate reality where the Cold War never ended and things just got bleaker and bleaker. For seconds, we have things to do when we’re bored. The tagline that accompanies this video is, “Wenn man zu viel langeweile hat”, which according to Google means, “For when you’re bored”. When I’m bored, I watch sports, play video games, read a book, drink beers, meet up with friends or hang out with a very young and alluring hooker your mom.

The Germans on the other hand like to jump off skyscrapers onto adjacent, albeit smaller and pretty far away, skyscrapers. And what the hell is with the mats? I’ve seen plenty of parkour videos and the only time there’s mats is when they’re practicing in a gym. When they step out into the real world it’s no mats, lest the other parkourians think you’re a pussy. Sure he probably would have shattered his ankles and blown out his knees, but he would have died had he missed the other rooftop.

I guess there’s a lesson to be taken from this video. Don’t be a pussy, leave your pads at your girlfriends house. She needs them more.

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One Comment for “What The Germans Are Thankful For”

  • Parkour Runner says:

    Seriously? Let’s see you jump 20 feet forward and drop 40 feet and be perfectly fine. I have seen and done plenty of parkour and I see professionals using pads when they do things like this. The human body has limits, and this is a little past it. Thus the pads. And plus, this would have killed him if he missed, so obviously the pads were there for a reason, not him being afraid. Next time you try to call us pussies, show us you doing the same thing without the pads.


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