- Booty Booty Booty Booty rckin everywhere.
Yes. The Giants are finally in headlines. At least in New York, they are. It’s because of a past mistake. So like you, to your mother. Well, I have a morphine drip that will make Brittany Murphy’s cold dead pussy water plus a lot of time so here comes a Giants rant. No, you eat it.
Well this all started with my favorite current NFL player who is not on the Giants, Jeremy Shockey. Jeremy Shockey is pretty much a revolutionary. He is the greatest thing to ever happen to the NFL since Bill Romanowski. After the Giants’ legendary Super Bowl run in 2007, they traded my hero to the Saints because they thought they didn’t need him after playing 5 games without him. Fat Kevin Boss made one or two catches and Jerry Reese douched up the place. It’s not a good thing. The Saints were willing to give up a 2nd and 5th round pick for Shockey which turned out to be WAY to low. The Giants drafted Clint Sintim and Rhett Bomar. Ask me if I would take that. Go ahead. Ask me… NO FUCKING WAY. That could have been a great deal if the Giants drafted Shonn Green (awesome) and Johnny Knox (Pro Bowl). But it wasn’t. It was Rhett Bomar. Are we looking to replace Eli soon? Seriously? You gave him a contract extension. Hell, we could’ve used Thomas Morstead (who by the way, the Saints also have) over Bomar.
Anyway, Osi Umenyiora is threatening the coaching staff this week. He also shits on women. Osi says that if he doesn’t earn the starting job, he’s taking his ball and he is going home. Well, Osi…FUCK YOU. We don’t need you, at all. Have you heard of a man named Mathias Kiwanuka? Yeah. Well. He has a blacker name than you. Plus! He doesn’t cry. Like a woman. Who is weak.
Obviously, you have to trade Osi. It’s the only Logical solution. Seriously. You are bringing in the new Perry Fewell who may want to keep him, but the thing is, it looks like you would be giving in to his demands. From the other side, as a player, you can’t handcuff a coach like that. As management, you can’t move people any time they slightly get out of line. Look at what Brandon Marshall does with Denver after that Cutler debcle. It just doesn’t help your team. The reason that I vote for “trade” is because, what happens if you keep him, promise him the job and then not start him because he sucks or Kiwnuka is that good? You’re effed in the bee, my friend.
Beeteedubs, Fewell also runs a cover 2 which requires athletic linebackers (Giants have 1) and ball hawking safeties (Kenny Phillips), so I think we’ll be solid. /mouthfart.
Back to Osi. Well, I think you can get a similar deal for Osi that you did with Shockey. Osi is pretty much a Pro Bowler every year, except in this case, Bill Sheridan hates him like he hates America and blitzing and the other one was Eli Manning being an inept and fragile leader/quarterback. A 2nd and a 5th rounder is pretty reasonable for a DE that can deliver 18 sacks and all he wants is a starting job. The reason why I say toss him is, because we don’t have a need at that position. The Giants at one time had 4 solid defensive ends. You can’t play that many! Get rid of him for some veteran talent at the positions that you need and let them compete now or draft players for a position where you have temporary solution in an area of need. While we are at it, ANYONE WANT A FAT PUSS OF A RUNNINGBACK?!?
I also wouldn’t be above trading Osi for players, either. But you need somewhat big names when dealing with a perennial All-Star. The Saints weren’t willing to give up a 2nd, 5th and Roman Harper for Shockey. Roman Harper? Seemed harmless, right? Yep. Made the Pro-Bowl and Super Bowl, this year. Especially if the G-Men can get a Pro-Bowl linebacker who can be a leader of a defense like Pierce was, or a ball-hawking/game-changing safety, let’s do it. Do it.
My perfect scenario? Trading the 15th over all pick and Osi for the pick that drafts Eric Berry. Dude’s a stud. Is it likely? Well, like I said…I’m on a lot of morphine.
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