I have watched about a handful of NBA games in the past few years. When I was still living in Florida I jumped on the Orlando Magic bandwagon briefly, but that was mainly about drinking with buddies in bars and the beauty of a town cheering on its sports team during a playoff run. It’s funny because I grew up an NBA fan more so than an NFL fan, but since about the year 2000 the scale has tipped all the way in the NFL’s favor. I have been meaning to watch an NBA playoff game this year after I’ve been hearing so much about it in the form of out-of-context tweeting with way too many exclamation points. The game I chose to watch was the third game in the Spurs vs. Suns series. I thought it may be entertaining to document my thoughts and observations during the experience. It turned out not to be all that entertaining so I have added pictures of hot Phoenix Suns cheerleaders looking nice and slutty. Better? I also forgot to start watching the game until the second half. Oops.
Early 3rd quarter:
- Who is this guy wearing #23 for the Suns? How is that number not retired after Cedric Ceballos wore it for the Suns?
- Steve Nash: I saw this video by Nash one time talking about drills and fundamentals. It was good.
- Manu Ginobli’s game is just like countless old guys I have played pick up games with over the years. He looks the part also.
- I wasn’t sure at first, but it turns out that is Grant Hill. So he still wears #33 but now plays for the Suns. I can’t believe he is still playing. Is it like his 18th season? He is like the Vinny Testaverde of the NBA. How old is he really?
- This Richardson guy wearing #23 for the Suns is definitely no Cedric Ceballos.
- Steve Nash looks like he may have had plastic surgery.
Late 3rd quarter:
- Now I know why people always say the Spurs are old. Their most energetic young whippersnapper is Antonio McDyess.
- This Bonner guy is like a poor man’s ginger Jon Paxson
- Spurs are getting too many offensive rebounds.
Early 4th Quarter:
- This is boring.
- After sideline interview with Greg Popovich I think, “I’d be grumpy too if I had that many pock marks.” Unfortunate.
- This commercial where Magic Johnson and others are basically in an episode of ‘Autotune the News‘ < The old Snoop Dogg campaign with Bootsy Collins. "Glory be, the funk's on me."
Late 4th Quarter:
- Let me guess, Steve Nash has back spasms, the dreaded white guy basketball injury. It took down Larry Bird late in his career. Raise awareness, NBA. Raise it.
- With just over 3 minutes left these announcers are raving at how exciting this game is. I’m having a hard time staying awake or thinking of anything mildly amusing to type.
- Remember Oliver Miller? “OOOOO Miller!!!”
That was underwhelming. Unfortunately the NBA did not win a fan back tonight. Until next time, bitches.
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I couldn’t agree more. The ONLY reason to watch the NBA is found in the four embedded pictures in the post.
Oliver Miller had the softest hands for a big man when he played with the Wolves.
Soft hands? Way too easy.