The Morning After Pill is a daily recap of the previous days events from the sporting world. Certain teams and entire sports are left out due to an extreme lack of caring or crippling hangovers. It’s probably the hangovers though, and they might not even be crippling. That’s how we roll. Send tips to tips@ thegallyblog.com.
NBA:
I would take a random shot in the dark and guess that there sure ain’t a whole lotta Laker fans that read this site, however, even when he’s not having the most obnoxious game of his life (last night had 30 points, 7 boards, 6 assists) Kobe Bryant still knows how to skull fuck you. He ended up being the catalyst for the Lakers game one win over the Boston Racists, 102 – 89. Boston is hoping that KG remembers how to finish around a hole (*wink!*), Ray Allen stops giving and receiving stupid phantom fouls, and Rasheed Wallace disappears into the Guatemalan sinkhole, otherwise they be in trouble.
NCAA Basketball:
Bad news in famous people updates (good news is you had four famous people dying since Memorial Day in your office pool?), but it appears that Hall of Fame coach John Wooden is in critical condition still after suffering from … something. No one knows because the doctors say releasing that information would be a “violation of medical privacy laws”. Really? I’ll show you some violation, stupid doctors …
NCAA Football:
Texas wrote up some (probably) fake stories yesterday about how they are apparently the new hot bitch on the playground being invited to join the Pac10, along with most of the Big XII South and … Colorado. Haha, ok, that’s how you know this story is false. No one wants to be affiliated with Colorado.
MLB Notes:
After getting fisted out of his perfect game, Armando Galarraga was designated to bring the lineup card out to home plate ump Jim Joyce, who was the masked man behind the fisting. They shared hugs, got a little romantic with scented candles and some Genuine blaring over the loudspeakers, then played some baseball. AND DRANK SOME BREWS, BROSKI (Note: May not have happened.)! Also, the Orioles sound like they’ll be firing their manager but can you really blame them? Baseball faults CLEARLY always fall on the manager.
NFL:
NFL news?!? Kind of. Darrel Revis, who might be one of the coolest cucumbers ever, is certainly not acting like one as he has decided to pout about his contract and has stated that he was ABSOLUTELY INSULTED by the Jets recent offer. What, was $10 dollars not enough for you? I will do some sexy things for that amount of money, Darrel. Call me. Reggie Wayne has followed suit, too. I mean with the hold out, not with getting sexy.
Sexy Time:
This has nothing to do with anything, but apparently we’re supposed to post sexy pictures? Try this one out:
- Pretty sure she's doing it wrong, and no one cares.
And maybe one for the ladies? Personal favorite:
- God dammit, you sexy SOB. Sing songs to me.
Ok, just kidding. That last one was for me too.
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this was quite confusing, i genuinely thought this was to do with the morning after pill, very funny though, made me laugh!!