I Know She Has Nothing To Do With This... Just Shut Up, Ok?
Happy Thursday, ladies and gentlemen. Thursday is a magical time. College kids start drinking because they have Friday off (or at least the smart ones), it’s now 8 hours of work until Friday and you get to Use Logic and Win Money. Today has one decent game on to watch. Which is rough if it sucks. Which means you have nothing better to do than comment on this magnificent section of The Gally Blog and tell me your thoughts. Especially your dirty ones. But most importantly? Thursday also means it’s time to get your picks in:
Gambling Addiction? (home team in ALL CAPS)
(note: I’ve been called out on my handicapping ability so extra games are added.)
Suicide Pool: New York Jets
NFL Best Bet: PACKERS (-13.5) over the Lions
NCAA Best Bet: ARIZONA (-4) over Stanford
Possible NFL Upset of the Week: Broncos (+3.5) over the CHARGERS
NCAA Possible Upset of the Week: Iowa (+2.5) over WISCONSIN
And just because it’s sexy: NOTRE DAME (+10) over University Southern California… Heisman Candidate Sweet Jim Clausen gets ND into a BCS bowl over USC and their Freshman QB on the road in this rivalry match.
Dbag Challenge: STEELERS (-14) over the Browns. Eagles (-14) over the RAIDERS. PATRIOTS (-9) over the Titans
Fantasy Football Advice: Well, my first pick would be Dennis Northcutt- WR- Detroit Lions. If Megatron is out, the overrated WR will step in as the #1 threat for the weak Lions. That didn’t sound too confident, did it? Well that is just if Megatron doesn’t play. So Jermichael Finley- TE- Green Bay Packers (who is playing those weak Lions) is my Fantasy Pick of the Week. He had a break out performance before the BYE v. Minnesota in which he showed great hands and speed as well as a reliable check down receiver for Aaron Rodgers who has been running for his life and may or may not be BJ Novak.
Ok, so I already did my Night Cap for the week with all my best bets and analysis. However, I forgot one thing. Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force needed to get his 2 cents in. So here is his STONE COLD LOCK OF THE CENTURY OF THE WEEK.
My weekly Thursday segment is here. First order of business? Joe Francis beating the bejesus out of Jayde Nicole. Is that how he treats girls that won’t flash him? Or was she too old? I wonder how he treats ugly broads because Jayde is pretty much perfect (NSFW Pictures Here). Besides the whole “Dating Brody Jenner” thing…
You Said It, Pedo Bear.
Next order of business? Gambling Addiction.
Tonight’s Bet: Nebraska (-3.5) over MIZZOU
NCAA Best Bet: TCU (away -1.5) over AIR FORCE
NFL Best Bet: Minnesota Vikings (-10) over ST. LOUIS RAMS
NFL Upset: DENVER BRONCOS (+3) over New England Patriots
Suicide Pool: Pittsburgh Steelers
This week is special because I have some fantasy advice for you. Don’t listen to “Pros”. I’m not a professional, I don’t get paid by anyone. So you can listen to me. Whoever wrote this article is a giant tool. Most likely you shouldn’t have to be told to start Peyton Manning, Ben Roethlisberger, Tony Romo or Adrian Peterson. That’s some of the worst advice I’ve ever heard. I wonder what he said about Rashard Mendenhall last week when he wasn’t playing the Lions? So after his 165 yards and 2 TDs against a better opponent, now he is a must start? Thanks, douche! That means 5 of his 8 starts were “no-brainers” in this little piece. Logic Says: Start Glen Coffee- RB- San Francisco. Last week before a BYE then Frank Gore might come back and on top of that, Atlanta has given up 300+ yards on the ground in 3 games.
Ok, I also got some Links:
With Roman Polanski roaming around Gally is getting nervous that he has competition! Oh noes!
And my last link is about none other than, Michael Vick and his stupid reality show on BET. This has to be the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen in my entire life. No exaggeration. I’m not a lawyer (I just tell people I want to be one to make me seem classy and educational) but isn’t it illegal to make profit off of felonies you committed? I thought that that was the reason why serial killers can’t sell their stories to Hollywood and make a buttload of cash from it. Whatever. This show is going to suck and I hope Vick shatters his fibula in a practice or in some sort of karmic way like running from a rabid pit bull. I hate him even more now that he is on the Eagles. Maybe Jared Allen’s Mullet could cock punch him?
Hello Gallions. I know I haven’t been keeping up with the Night Caps but then again, you aren’t fucking coming to them so blow it out your nose with a rubba hose. As you know, Thursdays I like to get my pick of the week in for the Suicide Pool and give some best bets in the gambling world for the weekend. So that’s exactly what we’re going to do. First we need some music:
I don’t care what people say, that is Baby Earl Jones if I’ve ever seen it. But it does add a sense of urgency to the post.
Any Links? Yes. They might be a few days old but I decided to cut down the Night Cap segment to weekly, so just effing deal with it, ok?
Mayhem Miller quickly became one of my favorite people when he started that bully beatdown show when kids get beat up by professional fighters for being jerky but this is even funnier than that. Mayhem makes some nerds defecate themselves at an EA Sports meeting about the MMA game they came out with.
I might be the only one in the world that still likes Entourage but I guess that’s because I like going against the grain. I love living like a rockstar and naked women. Nah, save the story line for the women… Let’s see some random celebrity cameos!
And lastly, I may start a position to get Flozell Adams kicked out of the league. He has been suspended in all 3 games this season. 1 of which, he tried to assassinate my favorite player in the NFL via leg whip. Justin Tuck is the double threat. He went to Notre Dame and is now on the New York Giants. You don’t get better than that. This is the first time since Luke Pettigout that I can say that about and Luke wasn’t nearly as sexy.
Gambling Addiction:
Suicide Pool: New York Giants.
College Football Best Bet: South Florida (-7) over SYRACUSE.
NFL Best Bet: I like the Giants -9 but that’s the suicide pick so we’ll go with Cincinnati Bengals (-6) over the CLEVELAND BROWNS
Fantasy Pick Up of the Week?
Glen Coffee, RB, San Francisco 49ers: He’s the starter in town for the next few weeks now that Frank Gore is out. This week he’s going against the Rams. Enough said.
Alright, I got some gratuitous pug action. Thanks, FilmDrunk for finding the pic. This is also where I reveal that I will be disposing of all of my disposable income in Atlantic City this weekend, starting tomorrow at 12PM. So I won’t be here for any gambling action or posting tomorrow or throughout the weekend. I’m sorry, I guess. I’m also sorry for not really writing a solid Night Cap because Flash Foward and then It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia was on.
Gambling Addiction?
NFL best bet: Giants (-3) at TAMPA BAY
NCAAFB best bet: GEORGIA TECH (-2.5) v. North Carolina
I wasn’t even going to post today because I will be commenting at Last Call for the Phoenix Pub all night tonight, especially during The Ultimate Fighter episode, but that was until I met Kenyon Blue of Idaho State. This guy is ridiculous. Every single move he has is ridiculous and breaks an ankle or starts a fire. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a guy that fast. I must know his 40 yard dash time. Immediately.
Music:
The Shout Out Louds- You Are Dreaming.
/sliceswrist.
Gambling Addiction?
Phoenix Mercury v. Los Angeles Sparks UNDER (177)
We went deep into the Addiction because we had the itch tonight (and drinking). As always, lines are brought to you by Centsports.
the Papa from Mamas and Papas was a sick bastard. I guess I needed to put that because that is what everyone is talking about these days. I mean he only raped her for 10 years. Pshh. No biggie.
To be honest, I know WWTDD, WithLeather, FilmDrunk and WarmingGlow but this Recall site with the same format as them has had some solid posts the last two days. Including this on Rampage Jackson retiring.
Tonight: No action. Too late to bet tonight + No football tomorrow = No Action.
I also hit with the Minnesota Vikings in the Suicide Pool. I’ll get back with a pick for that later in the week. Most likely Thursday.
As always Spreads are brought to you by Centsports where you can follow Gimp, Gally and I with our degenerate gambling ways.
Links:
In lieu of my Herschel Walker/MMA post, here is a longer list of other athletes turning to MMA/Boxing and surprisingly, the List of Professional Athletes that turned to MMA/Boxing is actually much more interesting than I thought. And to be honest, much more talented.
I have no idea who Nicola Roberts is but she sure is a snappy dresser!
And since this is supposed to be a video games blog as well as sports, Fallout 3 and Halo 3
Technically this is a Night Cap, but it’s way too early to be your last drink of the night. I just have to make like an aborted fetus and head out to a fundraiser. My buddy is running the NYC Marathon in honor of his father who recently died of lung cancer; there are going to be a bunch of kegs and people getting weird. So I needed to get a post out, because technically the interview was done last night.
I’m skipping tonight’s bet (okay, I’m not. It’s the Cubs over ST. LOUIS), but the real bet is Iowa (-4) against Arizona tomorrow. College football trumps baseball 10 times out of 10.
Suicide Pool Pick: Minnesota Vikings
Alright, let’s kick the tunes.
Compliments of my home town heroes Brand New- You Won’t Know.
Rock These Links:
WithLeather had a Power Rankings. I made it, and I’m actually pretty pumped about this. It may be cheesy self-promotion and soft money whoring, but with guys like Max Ballner running around trying to make me look stupid, it’s hard out there for a G. Ya heard?
This is why Big Daddy Drew gets book deals and 99.9% of other bloggers cry about it.
I apologize for the lack of posting tonight. I went to go see Inglorious Basterds and it was fantastic. One of the best movie I saw in a long while. And I also updated the Fantasy Page and wrote a post but it’ll be posted at prime time tomorrow as opposed to my night blogging bullshit. No offense Night Owls.
So what does that mean? I didn’t get in a Gambling Pick to you guys. I’m sorry again. I went with:
Atlanta with Jurrjens on the mound straight up over the Mets and the Phillies with Hamels going (-1.5) over the Nationals.
I also took MIAMI (-4) over Ga. Tech with the OVER of 54.
So I hope you listened to me on some of these games. Nate Quarry was a big hit last night. And the OVER bet tonight is thanks to Gimp so don’t blame me if it doesn’t hit.
Drake (f. Kanye West, Lil Wayne and Eminem)- Forever.
I don’t care, I need to get a little gangsta once in a while.
Links? Got ‘Em:
This guy is on a shit ton of drugs. He starts speaking in tongues. All on video camera. Police videos so they take a serious tone but it is effing hilarious.
Rihanna is wearing a see through shirt with her nipples pierced. I still think she’s hot. I don’t care if she’s damaged goods. She won’t be able to find better. If I just raise my voice without notice she’d shit herself. And then I’d be all like “Hit the gym, fattie” and she’d have to tell people that I’m good for her because I make her want to be a better person.
You know if there is any Hunter S. Thompson news, I’m going to post it. I didn’t even read it yet.
And Tucker Max news isn’t nearly as interesting anymore now that I think he’s a fake.
Alright. Let’s get it crackin right off the bat. You want fun and games? Go to the Last Call. I’m going to be commenting over there in like an hour or two if they are still ready to party. Gambling Addiction. BOOM!
Hit on my FC Barcelona and Liverpool parlay. (Push’s go to the winner). Missed on my 4 team baseball parlay because St. Louis was a bunch of douchecanoes. The other 3 hit.
Tonight’s best bet?
Nate “The Rock” Quarry. Uptown. Over Tim Credeur.
Got any links? Yup.
Kim Kardashian looks pretty nice right now. I mean, if that’s actually her and not CGI imaging. I’ve seen them make a pug talk!
This might be the best website I’ve ever stumbled across. Fuck Yeah 4Chan fulfills all your internet fad desires.
I’ll rock some Bloc Party for you
If you haven’t heard there is a Tucker Max movie coming out. God help us all. Next thing you know they’ll give a movie to Bad Ass Frank or Maddox. And then… Logic?
