I don’t completely know, but I might be the last guy that should be doing a memoriam of Senator Ted Kennedy. I’m Canadian and I’m the editor of a sports and comedy site. Yes it can be serious at times, but The Gally Blog is more about a fun sided look at sports. Then there’s the other mitigating factor. I’m a staunch political Right Winger, well that’s kind of a sports reference. I’m also a gigantic conservative, though that has more to do with fiscal policies than social policies. After all, my idol is Hunter S. Thompson and he was the strictest of Liberals. If I can forgive him for his failings, then I’m sure that I can forgive Kennedy for being on his side of the fence. Sure we’re all going to see the Republican Party of the USA, as well as other conservative/liberal ruling parties bow down and give him the utmost deference. Possibly more than he deserves, but not likely.
The next 4 days are likely going to be worse than when Michael Jackson was Murdered. I don’t mean that in an overly cynical reason, well maybe I do. The next few days we are all likely to be subjected to a non stop barrage of stories about America’s Royal Family. Sure, the Bush family could be considered the royal family but who are we kidding? The USA has not seemed to have gotten over not having a actual ruling family. Princess Di was revered, even though she was part of the British Royal Family. The Kennedy’s have been a national power since around the 1940′s. continue
Sports are a huge part of the world today. Almost every major city has a least one major sports team, and many “small” cities have at least one. It’s a multi-billion dollar industry. According to Wiki which got it’s info from forbes.com Sept. of ’08, Manchester United was worth $1.800B, Dallas Cowboys $1,612B, Washington Redskins $1,538B, New England Patriots $1,324B, and are all more valuable than the Yankees $1,306B(suck on that New York). It’s an industry where people devote their entire lives to either playing, covering or following the games.
It’s also something that adds an emotional component to people’s lives. This emotional component can be of the good or bad variety. Fans of the Cubs have to be dealing with the fact that they haven’t won a Championship in a 100 frikken years, and it’s counting. On the other hand, the Detroit Lions fans were overjoyed in 1991 when the team won a playoff game. It was the first playoff game that they had won in 44 years. They Haven’t Won One Since, which allows them to feel the other side and for you to laugh at them. No matter whether you’re on the winning or losing side of a real NFL team, you’re going to feel something at the end of a game.
Now most of us are alcoholics, fat lumps or people devoid of any modicum of athletic ability. That pickup game of Coed volleyball you play every other week doesn’t count, nor does getting off the couch to grab another beer. continue
I really don’t understand the dumpster fire that is the New York Mets. I don’t understand how one could watch this team. My father called me today and actually made me thank him for growing me up a Yankees fan. But to be honest… if I was to choose between being a cocky winner that everyone hates and a Mets fan that can get along with other people, I’d choose not choking except when giving myself a David Carradine .
The Mets are just not fun to watch. They have like one good player right now and everyone has been hurt at some point in the season. It goes way beyond Jose Reyes, Carlos Beltran and Carlos Delgado (the core of the team) they sent out a reasonable line-up each and every day. That included their All-Star, David Wright. But when Luis Castillo and Gary Sheffield anchor your line up, you know you are in trouble. Still, there has been worse.
I would go as far as to say that this is the worst team that any sport has ever seen. Now with the additional injuries of David Wright and Johan Santana their team is a full blown AIDs patient ready to get the flu. When you throw Billy Wagner, JJ Putz, John Maine, Oliver Perez, Alex Cora, Jonathon Niese, Fernando Martinez, Tim Redding, Angel Pagan, Brian Schneider, Ryan Church, Jeff Franceour, Ramon Martinez, Gary Sheffield and Fernando Nieve (at different times) on top of all that? You have to fire someone.
I’m not even sure where to start with this one. From what I’ve been able to gather from my 5+ years of Spanish classes is that the above video comes from an international basketball scrimmage game between Mexico and Uruguay. Okay so maybe it had nothing to do with my Spanish speaking abilities and more so on my ability to Google. Anyhoo, at some point during the game a verbal altercation occurs, which if international sporting events like soccer have taught us anything, it’s that things don’t end with verbal altercations.
So with that rule in mind the next progression in the altercation was some pushing, shoving, and throwing punches. Followed immediately by the Mexican players throwing things and wielding chairs. Seeing that coupled with an overexcited announcer and you get the feeling that you’re watching a Mexican pro wrestling match. All it really needed was someone doing a moonsault off the backboard and some interference by Hulk Hogan while the ref’s back was turned.
The best part of this basketbrawl? The two teams still have to play each other later this week in a real game. Something tells me that their game later this week will come with beefed up security that’s armed with rubber bullets and tear gas. I cannot wait.
Hello Gallybloggers. My name is Logic. I’ll be the one administering your consensual mind pain this evening.
Think about it. The NFL is exactly like the show that everyone who watches the NFL hates. I happen to love Entourage, (suck it Ufford) and am very upset that my free demo of premium cable has ended in the middle of a season (it’s hard out here for a G). But 9 times out 10 there is someone hating on Entourage and I realized that today. I was at work (no, real work) when I heard some old jew-broad describe Entourage:
“It’s a show about that guy from Walk to Remember who brings his goombas with him to Hollywood. You know, goombas, like Italians.”
After hearing that, I almost began hating one of my favorite shows. But seriously, the NFL is just like it. Listen up and let me school you for a second.
1. NOTHING EVER HAPPENS: After 6 seasons, Vince is still rich, Ari is a prick, Turtle does nothing and Drama is desperate. After 6 seasons Favre is still playing, the Lions are still losing, Philadelphia is still douchey and T.O. is trying desperately to cause drama.
2. When you describe it, it’s gay: “See honey, the idea is for those 11 men to try to pin that 1 man down as fast as they can before he runs away”. Tell me that isn’t the beginning to Cowboys Butts Drive Me Nuts 4?
3. When it comes down to it, 1 jerk is really in charge: Mark Wahlberg = Roger Goodell. Say hello to your mother for me. Yeah it’s Hulu, go screw Canada.
4. (the obvious) All of the douche bags- If you try to tell me a guy that changes his name to Hispanic nonsense is worse than a guy who collects graffiti sneakers I’ll go on a knife crazy rampage.
5. The Long Island Guys are the worst- I’m from LI New York, and so is “E” from Entourage. So is: Vinny Testaverde, Boomer Esiason, D’Brickashaw Ferguson, Amos Zereoue, Rich Ohrnberger and Todd Sauerbrun. Worst group ever. Hey, at least we got Billy Joel. Wait. He’s not cool anymore either? Dammit.
E with 2 of my College Room Mates (each at 5'9'' and 5'7'' respectively)
6. You almost root for them to fail- Who wants to see Vince do good? The best season was when Medellin bombs. The best season of the NFL was when the 16-0 Patriots lost the Super Bowl. (ok, I’m a Giants fan. When I drink on a Tuesday, I still say I’m celebrating the Super Bowl)
7. You start to hate people for being too awesome- I hate Tom Brady. And his $100 million. And his Super Model girlfriend. And his great looks. And his big arm. And his college degree from Michigain. Just like I hate Vince for sitting around all day reading words that another person wrote for an idea that another person had and he gets 30 tries to do it. Then after, he’ll take the PJ out to Cabo to go party with DJ Tiesto while dropping E-bombs and getting blowies from Jessica Alba.
8. When one person goes down, the world keeps turning- After Vince got shunned from Aquaman, they replaced him
with Jake Gyllenhaal. Michael Vick gets shunned from the NFL and Matt Ryan becomes a stud. It’s like karma for jocks rather than foppish dandies.
9. All the cool scenarios won’t happen in real life- The Super Bowl won’t be Buffalo v. Dallas or NYG v. Colts or Chicago v. Denver. It just won’t happen like that. Just like Aquaman, Medellin and the Joey Ramone story. Awesome ideas, where is the finished product?
10. Despite knowing it’s douchey and there’s better stuff on, I’ll still watch- Sure MMA is probably a cooler sport. Sure Mad Men is probably a better show. But don’t you just like old reliable where the characters are going to toast the night away at the end of the night where you cry yourself to sleep wishing you were them.
[Edit:Damn the Japanese. They filed a copyright complaint against this video. Damn them to hell]
Really? I mean, you seriously got knocked out that fast? My prom date didn’t even go down nearly that quickly and she was drunk off of like two Smirnoff Ices. I, personally, have put up more of a fight trying to remove my jeans after a long and heavy night of drinking. Even then I’ll at least give some effort before giving up and rolling over like stuck pig. Which is usually followed by uncontrolled vomiting and loss of bowel control.
I’ve never seen where charging like a bull was ever an effective strategy outside of the Running of the Bulls. And even then they still get killed at the end. He might have the speed and tenacity that makes for a good linebacker, but as far as martial artist go, he’s definitely sub-par.
I wouldn’t be surprised if the Raiders try to sign him on the free agent market since they are well known for drafting players based on speed and speed alone (ie Drafting Darrius Heyward-Bey over Michael Crabtree). The downside is our little fighter will go limp faster than Al Davis after his Viagra wears off.
In prison being a “wide receiver” has a totally different meaning…
Well it seems that former New York Giants’ wide receiver and 2nd Amendment supporter Plaxico Burress will not be playing football anytime soon. Plaxico instead will be heading down the path toward salvation and rehabilitation, much like Michael Vick and Donte Stallworth before him. The kind of salvation and rehabilitation that can only come from being confined in an 8 by 8 cell, fighting for your life on a daily basis, and making sure to never ever drop the soap. Yep, prison baby.
Burress pleaded guilty to criminal possession of a weapon, but that’s really only because there is no legal charge against someone for accidentally shooting themselves. However, you can be labeled a dumbass, become a possible recipient of a Darwin Award, and in Plaxico’s case get two years in prison.
Don’t inmates tend to like guys with a lankier build? His cellmate is going to love him.
Let’s face it folks the only thing Plaxico Burress is guilty of here is wearing sweat pants in a club. I mean how the hell did he even get in to the club in the first place. If the bouncer was properly doing his job this whole fiasco would have been totally avoided.
In my opinion the only positive out of this whole going to jail and having other men force themselves on you situation is for Burress to possibly parlay his prison stint in to HBO’s next season of Hard Knocks. Think about it people. It would be perfect. Guest appearances could include NFL athletes like Donte Stallworth and Chad Johnson Ochocinco coming to the prison to keep Burress’ morale up. Maybe Michael Vick and Tony Dungy could even stop in to give an inspirational talk. There could even be an episode where he gets shanked in the cafeteria. That would be some drama. I’m just saying.
In all seriousness, this video is completely amazing. It has a catchy likeable song, and it has that cutesy factor going for it. There’s also the incredible nostalgia factor going for it, and has pretty much every Sesame Street character in it, including Kermit(who appeared on the show back in the early days.
But of course this video also has a seedy dark side to it. continue
The end of the world is upon us. Kind of. Sort of. Well actually not really at all. But if it was we’d totally be screwed. At least according to a recent study coming out of the University of Ottawa.
Thanks Canada. First Canadian bacon, which is nothing like the bacon I’m used to, and now a study based on a scenario that is only plausible in the movies. You must really love fucking with me.
The scientific paper, which is published in a book “Infectious Diseases Modelling Research Progress”, looks at an attack by the undead creatures, who infect the living with a bite.
I’m really glad that educational institutions are using research money on fictional scenarios derived from movies like Dawn of the Dead, 28 Days Later and my personal favorite Tokyo Zombie. Instead of doing research on some of the less important and realer issues like cancer, AIDS, or other types of debilitating illnesses.
Okay so you wasted money to conduct this study. What were your findings on this highly improbable situation?
They concluded there was no point trying to cure those infected or live with them – the best thing was to destroy them as quickly as possible.
You actually conducted research that concluded killing the zombies would be the best solution? Sounds honestly like they just sat around all day getting high and watching zombie movies. I’m not a researcher, but I’ve seen enough zombie movies to know that your best chance for survival in a zombie apocalypse is to kill as many zombies as humanly possible. I think just about everyone knows that.
What’s next University of Ottawa? Research on whether machines will rise up and revolt against its human makers, like in the Terminator series?
Good afternoon folks. I’m gally and today I sat down with Tiger Woods to discuss life, love and the 2009 PGA Championship.
Gally: Good afternoon Tiger. I’m glad you could be here.
Tiger: Good afternoon gally. I’m happy to be here.
Gally: How’s Elin and the kids?
Tiger: Oh they’re great. Things are great. Couldn’t be happier. In fact we’re thinking of having another child.
Gally: Really? That’s fantastic. Congratulations!
Tiger: Thank you. You know it’s a great time to be alive.
Gally: Wow, you sure seem happy.
Tiger: Of course. I’m wildly successful at wht I do, I love my job and my family. And of course I’m wealthy enough that my family never has to worry about their financial future. I have absolutely mo reason to not be happy.
In prison being a “wide receiver” has a totally different meaning…
