Using Logic III
Once again, I’ve been emailed by a Logician with an important story that needs to be addressed. I was actually emailed last week, but I already did my Using Logic segment for the week at that time. Like I said, I’ll get around to everybody! Even you, Braylon Edwards. Remember, hands are for catching not throwing. As always, my email address is HatedHero11@gmail.com if you have any tips or submissions. Here’s the letter in its entirety:
Dear Logic,
Hello and thank you for fielding my letter. I can tell you are busy with douche bags who don’t enjoy your work, but I need help. I’m so distraught I don’t know what to do with myself. I’ve been complaining about having an extra toe all of my life and now I see this: 8 days ago it was reported on ESPN.com that a golfer who is missing a leg is going to tee off for the Champions Tour in 2010. I’ve never felt worse in my entire life. I’m complaining about having extra body parts that don’t affect my life and this guy is missing body parts that detract from his career.
But that is beside the point. For this man to play in this tournament, he is going to need some sort of help to stand and I think this will give him a distinct advantage over other players that are participating. Am I being insensitive for trying to keep sports on a level playing field? I’ve already sent a letter to Bud Selig saying that steroid users should be castrated. Please help!
Sincerely,
MetalMouth
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