Last Call is kind of like blogkakke, except on PCP, LSD and ludes man. Fucking ludes. Instead of just being a random link dump, it’s a place to gather with like minded sports fans, amateur comedians and dope fiends after a hard day in the salt mine. If you have something you’d like to see here or just want to know about our fascination with Minnesota, our contact info is over there on the right and there’s always the comment section. So come on in, kick your shoes off and grab a nice 18 year old scotch and spout off about your local sports team, tell us a joke or tell us about that time AJ Daulerio kicked your cat or had sex with your mother, aunt and sister at the same time.
A few things I would like to mention before getting started today. First of all, our resident guy who stands too close to the ficus, Gimp, welcomed his lovely daughter to the world last night. It’s a good thing she looks like her mother. Secondly, as you may have noticed, we’ve added a couple new writers to the staff. Most of you all know White Speed Receiver, Chubs K Gun and PJDiaries of Purple Jesus Diaries. If you don’t know those guys, say hi. They’re pretty solid people. Lastly, we’re expanding. Yeah, that’s right, expanding for our loyal audience of 12. While this site will remain primarily focused on sports and dick jokes, we will be folding other things into the fold. This, for example.
Musical Interlude:
Presumably the highlight from last nights Grammy awards, and without ALL the censorship.
Linkage:
ROTU: Site friend, Brandon, started a mailbag. Nobody asked him a question, so he answered questions destined for other people. continue on for excellence
I apologize for the lack of posting tonight. I went to go see Inglorious Basterds and it was fantastic. One of the best movie I saw in a long while. And I also updated the Fantasy Page and wrote a post but it’ll be posted at prime time tomorrow as opposed to my night blogging bullshit. No offense Night Owls.
So what does that mean? I didn’t get in a Gambling Pick to you guys. I’m sorry again. I went with:
Atlanta with Jurrjens on the mound straight up over the Mets and the Phillies with Hamels going (-1.5) over the Nationals.
I also took MIAMI (-4) over Ga. Tech with the OVER of 54.
So I hope you listened to me on some of these games. Nate Quarry was a big hit last night. And the OVER bet tonight is thanks to Gimp so don’t blame me if it doesn’t hit.
Drake (f. Kanye West, Lil Wayne and Eminem)- Forever.
I don’t care, I need to get a little gangsta once in a while.
Links? Got ‘Em:
This guy is on a shit ton of drugs. He starts speaking in tongues. All on video camera. Police videos so they take a serious tone but it is effing hilarious.
Rihanna is wearing a see through shirt with her nipples pierced. I still think she’s hot. I don’t care if she’s damaged goods. She won’t be able to find better. If I just raise my voice without notice she’d shit herself. And then I’d be all like “Hit the gym, fattie” and she’d have to tell people that I’m good for her because I make her want to be a better person.
You know if there is any Hunter S. Thompson news, I’m going to post it. I didn’t even read it yet.
And Tucker Max news isn’t nearly as interesting anymore now that I think he’s a fake.