Sports, Satire and Bad Jokes
Saturday November 26th 2011

Posts Tagged ‘Fail’

Last Call: The I Did It Again Edition

An oldie but a goodie.

Good evening you sniffers of fine vintage taint. Again, I’m out of the house right now and didn’t set this up properly. So come in and discuss whatever it is that warms the cockles of your heart. I’ll be home shortly and will reward you with finest cheesecake, music, comedy and linkage the Internet has to offer. Ciao.

Musical Interlude:


Purple Jesus Diaries: The infamous, exclusive and 100% legit Randy Moss speech. Too legit to quit even.
WWTDD: For the second day in a row, Brendan has a post that is Pedobear approved.
Film Drunk: The ten most pretentious Jackass 3D reviews. Really people? Really?
Sportress of Blogitude: See, ESPN doesn’t always suck. Season 5 of Mayne street is about to begin.
Daddys Sugar Ball: The DSB guys are getting all grown up as they launch a new sister site. Congrats ladies.
The Tasty Kitchen Blog: A new user fueled recipe blog by The Pioneer Woman. This specific recipe looks fantastic and rather mouth watering.
Posted Sports: Bruce Arthur presents his excellent, as always, take on the NFL and head shots.
Joe Posnanski Blog: Joe presents the top 32 NFL coaches as football players. Yes, there’s only 32 coaches in the NFL. Deal with it.
Press Coverage: If you guys hadn’t heard, Yardbarker has been officially been bought by Fox Sports. Yes, this is now a Fox Sports blog, woot!?! Dan Levy wonders if it’s a big step or the end of independent sports blogs.
EDSBS: The Howard Schnellenberger top 25. Oh dementia.

Bananas Foster Cheesecake(ie, glorious eye candy): (more…)

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Party Pug, you need help..

I’m having major computer issues here this morning. Combining that with what appears to be server issues and we have the ingredients for a rough day. I hope to have things fixed by this afternoon, but Last Call will go on unaffected tonight. TTFN

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Soccer player drops the boom on fellow teammate.

Painful Soccer Player Double Fail – Watch more Funny Videos

If there’s one thing I like more than steak, lesbian porn, and the occasional blumpkin it would have to be a good old fashion collision. And while soccer isn’t as contact oriented as say football and hockey, those footballers have been known to bring the pain from time to time. In this case it’s not a dirty slide tackle or a kick to an opponent’s head. No this time it’s one player crashing into his fellow teammate. Now I can’t really tell if the parties involved were really that injured or just really that embarrassed. However, while that is embarrassing, on the embarrassing scale crashing into your teammate is nowhere near as bad as that time I made out with my 2nd cousin as making out with your 2nd cousin at a frat party.

"It's cool man, I don't think anyone saw it." /pats and rubs back

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Two Alex’s, One Puck

Alex Auld is a goaltender for the Dallas Stars of the NHL. Last night against his former team, the Vancouver Canucks, Auld tried to emulate his teammate Marty Turco’s prowess with the puck. He ended up emulating catch the greased up deaf guy from Family Guy, by slipping and giving the puck to Alex Burrows. Wait, two hockey posts in one week? Fuck and or yes kiddos. Football is winding down and where else are we going to get random acts of violence and depravity? Pitching and catching? Well maybe baseball’s pitching and catching is a little more depraved than we thought, but I doubt it.

Unfortunately, unlike the last blooper that I posted, Alex Auld has no excuse on this one. He’s not even French.

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WINter Fail

WINter fail is what this is all about. Get it? By watching this you win at life, and sports. So some chap from Mother Europe decided to make a compilation of various winter time failing. You see, much of this world gets snow and ice, but nobody handles it as well as us Canadians. Well Global Warming decided to make it cold as balls everywhere and now none of these stupid fucks know what to do. Hey look at that paper thin ice! How’s aboot we try to cross it? That sounds like a fantastic idea.

Fortunately for you it’s a fantastic idea. You get to see people do face plants and other such hijinks. Unfortunately, nobody dies in this video, though a chick gets run over by her own car. That’s always good for a laugh. And hey, maybe other morons will see that nobody dies in this and think they’re bulletproof. The result, reality TV and a strengthening of the gene pool. Hooray for voluntary eugenics.

via. Fun-Vids from Phun(both NSFW)

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Marc-Andre Fleury Is A Silly Frenchman

Playing the goaltender position in hockey is one of the toughest spots to play in any sport, professional or amateur, and this includes your ballroom dancing class. The above video is from last nights Pittsburgh vs. Minnesota NHL game. That was journeyman, will play for puck bunnies and beer, Eric Belanger scoring a hilight reel goal.

Mainly it’s a hilight of a complete lapse in judgement and mental accumen by the Penguins goalie, Marc-Andre Fleury. It goes to prove my statement that the French are only good for two things. Cheese and surrendering. Well, I guess we can add failing hilariously to that list now too. Below the jump is more fail from Fleury and a picture of a puppy.
more fail

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Girls Can’t Snowboard*

If the Internet has taught me anything, it’s that it’s always right and that women only have certain uses. According to this video, one of those uses is not snowboarding. Enjoy the epic failness that is the above video.


*May not be a factual statement.  Does anyone know of a place where I could do some fact checking?


Source, via Phun

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How not to answer a question…

The above video is of the Buffalo Bills’ 7th round draft pick, Ellis Lanksder showing us how not to answer a question. Either that or he’s doing what could only be described as his best impression of a Valley girl, by saying “like um” at least 100 times. Somewhere between the 5th and 6th “like um” I lost count out of sure disbelief that this was actually happening.

Maybe Lanksder is just camera shy. Maybe there’s a good looking blonde in the front row, and he can’t multi-task staring at her breasts and answering a simple question. Or maybe he’s just confused and disoriented as a result of going from West Virginia (where he played in college) to Buffalo. Say good-bye to rural towns, meth labs and incestuous relationships. Say hello to TO’s overinflated ego and a sense of disappointment that’s been growing since the 90s . That’s more than enough to make anyone lose their focus and start jabbering nonsensical “like ums.”

Either that or drugs…

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Keyboard Cat: Redux

So Ufford over at Warming Glow, and other sites kept bringing up Keyboard Cat.

He was right about it, Keyboard Cat is amazing. I just watched the video several times over. It warms the cockles of my blackened heart. Now since becoming an internet meme, it’s taking off.

After the jump, some of the best remixes.

continue

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