I think we all know the insane story of Jon Koppenhaver. From the comments about Evan Tanner (or depending on how you look at it, the refusal to Joe Silva’s match, which is like refusing Don Corleone) that got him thrown out of the UFC, to the Gaybashing and then the name change. Then, like any sane person, he turned to porn (NSFWish Pic). I’m not going to lie, I haven’t seen the first video yet. I pretty much troll porn all day long and I still can’t find it. I don’t think I really need to see it because it would make me gay. Why? Well, because I’ve already seen her naked so really…what am I looking at?
I have no problem with War Machine. I hope he reads this. I follow him on Twitter and have actually had a few lines of dialogue with him. He is even friends with Long Island MMA product, Phil Baroni. He seems like a good dude at heart and means well but gets thrown into extraordinary situations where he doesn’t always make the right decision. And you know what? It fucking worked out well, huh? Joe Rogan has a great joke about how War Machine gets paid to fight and fuck, but I’m not him (despite my “drinking for days” beard) so I won’t try to make it. Can a man ask for more? I would argue: No. No you can’t.
Anyway, the point of this article (other than to tell you how insanely jealous I am of War Machine) is that he has a new video on “Real Slut Party”. Fightlinker has the links to the hardcore NSFW stuff, so check them out. He is partnered with some girl named Jules. I don’t know who she truly is and the Redtube video has her labeled as “Busty Jules” but in porn that’s like being called “Pantsless Blogger”.
If you couldn’t tell from the title, this commercial is a little NSFW. That doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t watch it. You should totally watch it.
The above commercial is for a Danish energy drink. Cult Raw Energy, double caffinated and not for kids. While the video isn’t overly sports related, Energy Drinks are sports related and that’s close enough for me. RAWRR, the video is metal without being metal**. Theres violence, theft, drug use, drinking, hookers, a car crash and the ever important record scratch* surprise ending. The soundtrack is even doable. All I’m saying is that if American commercials were this cool, there would be no economic crisis going on right now. I’d buy anything with commercials like this. In fact, I’m going to order a crate of this stuff and have it shipped over here.
* Not actually a record scratch, but how much better would it be if there was one?
Today it’s time to sit down with The Gally Blog’s latest interviewee, Jared Allen’s Mullet. What’s that you say? A mullet, how the hell are we supposed to interview a mullet? Have you seen that thing? It’s not nearly as hard as it sounds. That thing has a mind and life of it’s own. I caution you. The thing gets a little wierd and out of hand when Jared shows up.
Gally: Well good afternoon Jared Allen’s Mullet. It’s nice to have you here. JAM: It’s nice to be here. Wait what did you call me? Gally: Jared Allen’s Mullet. JAM: Why the hell would you call me that? Gally: Well that’s your name isn’t it. continue
Good afternoon folks. I’m gally and today I sat down with Tiger Woods to discuss life, love and the 2009 PGA Championship.
Gally: Good afternoon Tiger. I’m glad you could be here.
Tiger: Good afternoon gally. I’m happy to be here.
Gally: How’s Elin and the kids?
Tiger: Oh they’re great. Things are great. Couldn’t be happier. In fact we’re thinking of having another child.
Gally: Really? That’s fantastic. Congratulations!
Tiger: Thank you. You know it’s a great time to be alive.
Gally: Wow, you sure seem happy.
Tiger: Of course. I’m wildly successful at wht I do, I love my job and my family. And of course I’m wealthy enough that my family never has to worry about their financial future. I have absolutely mo reason to not be happy.
