I don’t know what kind of karma cat the Steelers stepped on but everything is just crumbling around them and it’s awesome. Now, I should probably take a shot at K-Gun here to keep the witty banter up between the writers on the site, but like Bill Simmons said, when you pick a fight on the internet…you gotta fight up. I would not be fighting up. Get it? He’s a nothing!
Moving on, Santanio Holmes is a classy gentleman. Apparently he was at a night club where he needed a seat and he asked politely if some lady would move from her seat so he could rest his tired feet. Don’t football players know to just not go out? Because none of what I said was true. Santanio Holmes took his beer bottle (most likely Colt 45 because I’m told that’s what the blacks drink) and smashed it in some woman’s face until she was bleeding from her eye when she wouldn’t give up her seat. I personally, find this hysterical because I’m 95% sure he really respects Rosa Parks.
Santanio Holmes reminds me of this black gentleman that is a hat collector and she was late on her hat payments. (Note: I just wanted to post a video of comedy power houses Opie, Anthony, Jimmy Norton and Jim Jefferies all punching their tickets to hell by laughing at a 101 year old woman getting mugged and repeatedly punched in the face.)
Punter was right. This Oden pic is pure comedy gold and there is no one who can stay away from it. And no, it’s not the banner picture. That’s just kind of goofy. It’s the type of picture that makes you look and go: “How does an ugly motherf-cker like Greg Oden, get those hot white girls?” Well besides the obvious: “He’s a millionaire athlete and a recognizable face in basketball because he is basically the black Rocky Dennis“. Thenew evidence (LOGICal Heads Up: NSFW pictures of mandick over there…) is clearly overwhelming in the favor of Oden to show that he is a lady killer. Literally. I bet he’s killed a woman with his penis. If you are here just for the details of this enormous flesh sword that’s probably ruined father’s lives everwhere, then just know it drapes to half of his thigh. He is 7’0 tall. Go over the proportions in your head (get brain f-cked?). I sent my sources out to the professional world, and I’ve been told that Santanio Holmes and Visanthe Shianco just feel like less of men these days… Then, Tiger Woods was reported to have said: “Wait. All black guys are supposed to be hung similar to that?!? How come, I just love watermelon and talk through movies???!? GOD!!! WHYYYYY!!????!? GOD DAMN YOU 50% RACIAL SLUR GENERATOR! DAMN YOU TO HELL!” while falling to his knees in the rain.
